Will You Be My Friend?

We came here knowing not a single soul! My closest friend Melissa is in San Antonio, which is more than four hours away. I cannot wait to see her, and am so glad we're closer to each other than we were, but a four-hour drive means we won't be seeing lots of each other. It's been nearly a month since I last saw my friends and family. That's one month of talking almost exclusively to a 2-year-old and Tim. And as much as it pains to me admit this, I'm pretty sure Nigel's growing bored with me already, too. Sure, there have been the occasional adult conversations: dinner with Tim's great-uncle and great-aunt, Tim's coworkers at the office Thanksgiving potluck, the ladies at the grocery store who stop to tell me how beautiful Nigel is... But I haven't made any friends yet. Frankly, I've almost forgotten how it all works. And let's face it, I'm not the most outgoing person to begin with. So how are we supposed to meet people when I don't work outside of the home, we don't go to church, Nigel won't start preschool until September and all of Tim's coworkers live more than an hour away from us?

I've spotted "our people"* at the grocery store before, but what am I supposed to do? Walk up to them and say, "Hey, will you be my friend?" The easiest, logical way to meet folks seems to be through Nigel — strike up a conversation at the park. Only one problem: there are no kids at our park. Nigel and I go to the park almost daily, and the three of us go on the weekends. With the exception of two times, we're always the only people on the playground (One time some kids were cursing while their dad sat in the car, so I made Nigel leave. The other time the family didn't speak English, so the friendship sparks weren't able to fly.) We've seen signs of children on our street — play equipment in backyards, bikes on the porch — but no kid sightings.

So, while I build up my Spanish skills, I thought we'd check out storytime at the library. Storytime at Belmont in RVA was always so much fun for Nigel and I. No dice here, either. The weekly fun at our area library is geared more toward 5-ish-year-olds since, as the librarian told me, "the area isn't affluent enough for a toddler storytime; there are no stay-at-home-moms." (How in the world are you supposed to know all of this stuff when you're moving from another state!?! Yet another reason why we'll be moving to another neighborhood next fall.)

Today at a mall play area I thought I was on the verge of getting another mom's number (sounds a bit like dating, huh?) when her daughter pushed her son and they had to leave. But I'm not giving up! My friend Annemarie has put me in touch with one of her friends who lives here, and we're planning to meet up soon. I've also joined a meetup.com group for women who are new to the FW area. They're having a cookie swap this Sunday. I've signed up to go; let's hope I don't chicken out at the last minute.

* "Our people" can usually be spotted in the bulk-bin section of Whole Foods buying lentils. They may or may not drive a VW. Quite often they have at least one Mac in their home, but they definitely read nonfiction and listen to NPR frequently. They like good food (they know a French fry isn't a vegetable), and they don't do a double take at our family. They are on both sides of the political fence, but they are not members of the NRA or PETA. They have GLBT friends, as well as friends from various ethnic backgrounds. In summary, they are your everyday nerds who don't quite yet know that they're nerds.